Family...

Recently, I've had cause to count my blessings. In real life, I'm struggling...living with a house mate who suffers from npd (narcissistic personality disorder) is a trial to the heart and soul. Over the years, I've read a lot on the subject and sadly, it isn't even their fault in the end. A pernicious circumstance of feast or famine, love or rejection is believed to be the cause of this disorder.And worse, it's virtually impossible to treat since the sufferer can't comprehend the possibility that he  or she needs therapy in the first place.

So, I've had days of deep crying screaming fits where I said going to jail would be better than this.

It's tough to be even slightly dependent on someone who views you as the millstone around their neck.

But, and it's a big giant BUT.

The family I have found in SL gives me so much happiness, and a sense of warmth and confidence I have not felt in a long time. I used to look at other families with envy and yearning, wistfulness.

But now I have that. I'm so grateful to my precious Roxan sisters, Dame and  Ash, to my equally precious brother in law Sin, to my darling Rhodes-Lescher brothers Dresden and Brian and to my sweetest Rhodes-Lescher sister Lessa. Your constant love, companionship and support help me keep going every day.   You're such amazing people and I am privileged to be among you.

I won't say every day is just sunshine and stars. But it's worth getting through the bad days to get to the good ones.  I've had low points where I wondered why I was still waking up every day. I won't front and pretend it's all peachy. If you know me well, you know I have bad days physically and mentally. But  have good ones to... and those make up for a lot.

This past weekend was two whole days of good. Because of you. ♥

This is nothing but a quick gyazo snap of us, myself, my sister Dame and my sister Ash. I love you girls. Roxan Family Inc!

Over the weekend, I dressed up as a witch in my own very unique way. Pink Witch wins. Another simple gyazo snap.

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So...Absinthe Dreams

I'm hosting now a few times a week at this beautiful club, owned by my new adoptive family. The music is eclectic and we also have live performers there. I was really scared the first time I hosted but gradually I am getting the hang of it and finding that I enjoy it. The kind tips I receive also help my shopping addiction. ;)

You can find directions to Absinthe Dreams here, and check out their page on SocialVR here.
Especially check out the beautiful photos of the club. Like this one, taken by my big brothers Brian and Dresden.

It's been a little over a week since my last post which is longer than I usually like to go but, there's been rough spots healthwise with a lot of super bad headaches and some fibro flaring. But right now, knock wood, I'm doing pretty well.

There's also been some real highs and lows relationship wise as well. I realize now I did what I always do which is hope too hard and throw myself in heart first. I don't know that I know how to be any different... maybe this is part of my "never really grew up" thing that people comment on from time to time. I always think that love will win out, even though I have ample proof that isn't the case. I feel stupid about this and I guess it looks like I don't respect others' thoughts. If wishes were fishes and all that.

But on the upside, I've been accepted by both the Rhodes-Lescher family and by the Dame and Sin Ross family. I can't complain about that, in fact I'm very happy and grateful for their love and kindness. It feels good to be a sister again and to have that sense of belonging.

 

 I didn't take pics of myself this time for a surprise, ha, but I did take this one of Dame and I, also edited by me. I hope later to take pictures with other family members too.

More blogging soon. ♥

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In this house...I do love...

I haven't been blogging much mostly cause of two things 1) I've been busy because I moved into a new place on second life and 2) my head is killing me every single day. The little imps in my skull need to give it a rest already.

There's also a new development happening in my slife which is keeping me smiling even through the pain. I keep hanging on as they say

Saw this, and yeah... it's just me in my house, but the ideas still apply.

My new home is on the Island of M., it's so beautiful there. I took some beauty shots of it.

I can't take credit for most of the decor and landscaping, that was done by the talented owner of the island. It's very private so Im not mentioning names or anything like that. My pictures were taken in super large pixel size using windlight settings from Jackson Redstar aka Jax. You can download them in a zip file here.

On this last pic though most of the decor is mine, aside from the rails, thermometer and surfboard and I like how it looks so far. :)

 Edit: 1) I changed and moved things around so now it looks like this. -  

I didn't edit the image so it its what it is, but I'm happy. This is just a gyazo shot, and ignore the chair that didn't rez completely.  LOL

Anyway. Decor is from all over so, sorry folks no credits cause I'm evil. Except that that Hey Ya'll sign is from a gacha by Brixley. I'm very fond of it.

 

Here's a couple shots of me sitting in those chairs (i changed it from this blue teal to white) gotta love porch sitting.

Style notes: Lona Head  - Catwa, Maitreya Lara Body, Lilo's Fit shape edited heavily, eye appliers by Arte, hair base by e.vary, lipstick by LuxRebel, Eyeshadow by AlaskaMetro and Shiny Stuffs (i layered them) Tattoo by Nanika, hair by Dela, top by...  honestly don't remember. Decor by various. Ears by Swallow, Necklace by Cae

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